What It's About

Meet Casper

2011-01-09T07:52:00.000-08:00

So we added a new member to our growing family yesterday. Still very much in the adjustment period, but so far so good.

I'll share the story of how this came to be. It goes back quite a bit.

Last winter, shortly after moving here, DH and I heard a mewing coming from outside. He opened the door and let in a skinny young female cat. It was a particularly cold night, and one of our rare Alabama snows, at that, and we didn't have the heart to put her back out. So we let her say. When it warmed up again, we put her back out hoping she'd go back home, wherever she came from. But she didn't. As time passed, I asked neighbors, but no one claimed her. I told E1 that if she took good care of her, she could keep her and name her. She did.

Then in the spring we got chicks. We were keeping them in the house, and it made her very curious. We had to keep her away, and shoo her away from them often. I think it got to her, and she started fleeing outside. Then we went to visit family for Easter. When we got back, we didn't see her, but didn't think much of it. It was late. The next morning, I sent E1 out to catch her bus for school. And she came back in wailing. Her cat was dead in the road, right in front of our mailbox, where she caught the bus. I wanted to keep her home, but the bus suddenly showed up and she ran and jumped on it, tears still in her eyes, and I didn't get to talk to her again until she got home from school.

When she got home, we buried the cat in the place of her chosing. It was sometime around then, that I promised she could have another cat.

It took me this long to honor my promise. In the time between, I even tried to talk her into something else. I'm really not a cat person. But I did keep an eye out. I need to find a cat who could handle children, other pets, and not want to run outside. One that wasn't a kitten, but wasn't old either.

Yesterday, I found Casper on Craigslist. And now, here he is.

Hopefully, I'll get some decent pictures soon.

Recovery

2011-01-06T09:39:00.000-08:00

Well, Christmas is behind us and most of the illnesses seem to be as well. I wish I could say we made it through the holidays healthy, but we didn't. Still we all made it through alive and well enough. Things are looking up.

Hit the breadstore up the other day, and made a pretty good score.

That's 5 loaves of WW bread

2 dozen larg WW hamburger buns

2 dozen dinner rolls

and (not pictured) 2 lg packs of embarrassing sweet things, which I hid from the kids, rather than lay out on the table.

All for about $5.50. (Nothing cost more than .69)

I can pay that much for 2 loaves of WW bread at Publix. I put most of it in the freezer.

I love the discount breadstore!

Fail

2010-12-07T12:13:00.001-08:00

Well, clearly the whole posting every day in November was a total flop. Instead, I've been dealing with sickies. I hope it won't always be this rough. This is our first full fall/winter in Alabama, so hopefully, we are just sampling all the bugs we've been missing out on, and will get this all out of our system soon.

Currently, I have a constantly runny nose, stuffy ears and sore throat. The husband also has been sick with a sore throat for some time now. The youngest has a double ear infection and junk in her chest and is currently on breathing treatments and antibiotics. The middle daughter missed school again yesterday because she woke up with a fever. The oldest one has only recently stopped hacking like an aged smoker at bedtime.

Everyone needs to see the dentist, and the oldest girls are both supposed to see the eye doctor, because one is suspected to be farsighted and the other has a suspected astigmatism.

On the good news end of things though: Baby girl's heart problem is actually improved for the moment. Her gradient across the aortic valve has dropped! So it's not all bad news.

Peace and Christmas Lists

2010-11-17T11:08:00.000-08:00

I sent my two oldest back to school today. Usually I enjoy having my girls home with me. I really do. But when everyone is sick and cranky, it escalates to less than pleasant, really fast. At one point yesterday it started too seem perfectly reasonable to threaten to stab a ball they were fighting over. That's not generally how I handle things around here. Anyhow, now they are back at school. The toddler is napping and I'm experiencing something I haven't had in several days. QUIET! It's a beautiful thing.

I had the girls write their Christmas lists yesterday. Thought I'd share them here just for fun. E1's spelling was really good, but I'll admit I fixed the spelling on most of E2's words so that someone besides myself could read them.

E1's List

Mazin Hamster (purchased)
The Magic Tree House books (set 3)
Stuffed animal pegasus
My Little Pony
Remote control dinosaur
My Little Pony movie
flip over truck
chocolate
books
Loopz Game
Remote control car
Tasty Science (some kit she saw on amazon)
World of Zoo (*purchased)
How to Train a Dragon (*purchased)
Webkinz Golden Pegasus
Barbie Christmas Carol (movie)
Animal Crossing for Wii
Easy Bake Oven
Fashion Design Studio
Chef hat (Purchased)

E2's List

Toy Animal
Mazin Hamster (purchased)
Baby My Little Pony
Loopz Game
Remote toys (animal or car or...)
Pillow pet unicorn
strawberry shortcake berry cafe

Sick Days

2010-11-15T15:59:00.000-08:00

Kept the big girls home from school today. E2 has a fever and E1 just looks a mess. E3 a little fever this morning, but overall I think she's recovering. I'm not feeling so hot myself, but it could be worse. I've been wanting to blog, but I seem to have the baby on me so often.

I'm also trying to get Christmas stuff together. I was going to do more actual out of the house shopping. But I tried and it just wasn't working out. I felt like crap and really, all I was doing was risking picking up some other bug, so I called it off early and headed back home to my precious internet.

So Much For Blogging Every Day

2010-11-11T10:03:00.000-08:00

We've had a rough few days. E3 has been having some stomach issues. I'll spare you the details. It isn't pretty. So I haven't been able to do much, and yet I'm still just feeling so tired.

On the plus side, I saw my midwife today. The girls are out of school so they all came with me. They love going there because they get to go pet the goats. Also, the midwife's teenage daughter plays with them and they love it. I really love how close she is. Only 5 minutes away. I'll be having my baby there, as midwives can not do home births in Alabama. But I'll be able to do most of my laboring at home. I'm starting to really look forward to this birth. I'm still crazy nervous. But I'm starting to honestly hope and imagine that this could actually go well. My experience with E3 was wonderful, despite her heart defects. But my last experience has left me very wary.

Sick Day

2010-11-09T06:26:00.000-08:00

Spent most of yesterday with the toddler glued to me. She doesn't seem extraordinarily ill. She had a low-grade fever most of the day, runny nose, congested cough, not to mention some molars coming in. Poor little thing. It's hard sometimes not to over-analyze things with my little heart baby. Her breathing wasn't always ideal, and when she breaths fast even for a minute or two I start feeling panicky. If she remains sick I'll call her doctor. I'm so laid back about my older two girls. I hate that I am so different at times with my youngest. But I've learned that I can't afford to ignore things. On the off chance anything is up with her heart, it has to be addressed. Thankfully she'll be seeing a cardiologist soon anyhow. Hopefully we'll get more answers than we did last time.

Christmas Shopping

2010-11-07T15:14:00.000-08:00

I have finally started! I'm one who loves shopping for Christmas but I despise that last minute desperate rush that leaved me buying a bunch of meaningless gifts to fulfill the required gift giving obligations. I like to take my time, so I usually have started by now. Last year I didn't. I really regretted that, though I had little choice in the matter.

So I proudly present my first purchase. A wagon for my 1.5 year old. I'm looking forward to pulling her and the future E4 around our property in this.
http://www.amazon.com/Radio-Flyer-All-Terrain-Steel-Wagon/dp/B00000K1VS/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1289171616&sr=8-2

Not sure what else she'll get as it is rather pricey. But I think it will be worth it because she will enjoy it and it will be really useful for me.

Yesterday

2010-11-07T15:02:00.001-08:00

I forgot to blog. Oops. Oh well, I did actually get some things done around the house though. And had a great time hitting some thrift stores. Got the husband some pretty nice clothes for work. 2nd hand is definitely the way to go for shopping for men. Even proffesional men. I should have been doing that all along. I got him 4 nice shirts and 2 pairs of khakis. Also got E1 a winter coat, 2 pairs of jeans, and a shirt for E2 and one for E3. All for under $30. Not bad.

Blah

2010-11-05T12:38:00.000-07:00

I'm just having a not great day. Not sure why. I'm tired, my spirits are down, and I'm accomplishing very little. It's a harsh contrast to yesterday. I was feeling great, energetic and getting things done. I need to find that place again and focus.

I do have a roast with lots of veggies in the crockpot, so at least dinner is taken care of. I got what I hope is nearly all of the shopping done yesterday. I may go out later and get some salad greens. I usually look for a good price, but I didn't see one while I was out and forgot to just pick some up anyhow. We eat a salad with most meals, so it really is a must have.

I've been working on and making some progress in the kitchen (though I haven't yet today). I'm hoping to get some more done today. I'd love to get my pantry organized again. That's my main goal for today.

Shopping With Little Ones

2010-11-04T15:44:00.000-07:00

Took the baby shopping with me. That's nothing new, as it's just me and her during the day, so that's how I frequently do my shopping. It beats taking all 3 with me! She enjoys getting out of the house anyhow. She's a real people watcher.

Today she encouraged me to be more adventurous in the produce aisle and I now have a rutabaga. I'm not completely unfamiliar with them, and I do love winter veggies in general. I've just not actually cooked one before. So that'll be fun. She also asked for a head of cabbage, 3 bags of oranges and some green onions. I decided to have fun with it and go along. Though she was disappointed that I only bought 1 bag of oranges.

I do that with the older girls too. I let them go a little hog wild from time to time in the produce department. That way we all get to try different things and they feel like they are getting to help make the choices, and I can feel free to ignore them when we walk by the crackers and dry cereal aisle.

I admit I feel terribly clever when I leave the grocery store and my girls are acting like the worlds biggest winners because they each got to pick out a huge apple and bag of grapes.

Blogging Every Day This Month

2010-11-03T13:25:00.000-07:00

Yep. I'm trying to blog every day this month because I read somewhere that was the thing to do, and I'm in the mood for a challenge. Also I miss blogging and reading other people's blogs and this is a good way (theoretically) to get into the habit.

Problem is I'm really distracted right now, so it's hard for me to think of much to blog about. So here goes a mishmash of random things going on right now.

1. I have about 4 months left in this pregnancy. It's making me kind of nuts. If the baby doesn't seem to be moving enough, I get freaked out. When she is moving I find myself wondering if she's moving the "right way". Yep. I'm bonkers. I want so badly for her to be ok, and I feel so afraid she won't be. There is no actual evidence that anything is wrong with this baby or pregnancy.

2. Went to a math workshop at the girl's school today, toddler in tow. Not the most brilliant idea I've ever had. I was the only one there to bring a baby. She was not a quiet, patient little angel. People did notice. I chose not to stay for the second one. I did bring home the materials for it though. Some interesting stuff I plan to use soon.

3. Took the girls to see Toy Story 3 last night at the dollar theater. I love the dollar theater. Yes, we see everything way after the rest of the world, but it's cheap and fun, and still qualifies as "going out" with the kids. :) The movie wasn't as sad as I was afraid it was going to be.

4. House is still a mess. Nothing new to report there.

5. I'm thinking of cleaning out my car if it's not raining in a few minutes.

Airing My Dirty Laundry

2010-11-02T14:12:00.000-07:00

Today I'm just trying to get caught up on laundry. It's amazing how much laundry a family of 5 can create, particularly the 3 smallest members. We separate the laundry into: whites, colors, diapers and PINKS. So many pink clothes. I don't even like pink, lol. I have no idea how we managed to acquire so many pink things.

In other news; Tonight is Family Night. We haven't done one recently because we've been taking turns being tired, busy, or stretching the budget to it's breaking point. But we have plans tonight to resume that. Part of me would still rather hide in the bedroom and take a nap. Or do anything alone really. There never seems to be time for that. But I'm hoping this month I'll get things under control enough to be able to enjoy some quiet spells without having to think about all the things I need to do.

Chaos!

2010-11-01T15:55:00.001-07:00

So we just got back from a visit with the in-laws. We got back home, and it was a huge reality check. My house is a disaster. My laundry is backed up to last month. My pantry is a mess. My fridge needs cleaning out. My bathroom needs to be seriously scrubbed. Can't walk through my children's room without stepping on something. Everything is just in disarray.

I've got to clean this mess up, and I've got to learn to be more organized.

First, I have to figure out where to start.

Family Friendly Halloween Movies

2010-10-21T12:31:00.000-07:00

The kids have been wanting to watch spooky movies for Halloween, so I've been trying to brainstorm on what movies would be best for the whole family.

This is what I've come up with so far:

1. Hocus Pocus

Love this movie. Probably just about my favorite for the family because there is something in it for everyone. Some inappropriate humor in it. But I'm pretty liberal about things like that.

2. Nightmare before Christmas

Another that is a favorite for the whole family. May be too spooky for some of the more timid little ones. But my girls (5 and 7) love it.

3. Halloweentown (and it's sequels)

Cute, innocent fun. I first saw this on Disney Channel when I was much younger.

4. Labyrinth

Not a Halloween movie at all, but it's kind of spooky with the Goblin King and all.

5. Teen Witch

Not sure if my girls will like this one yet. May be more of a teen flick. But they are old enough to give it a shot. Kind of cheesy 80's stuff going on here, but I have fond memories of it.

6. Sabrina Teenage Witch

Also maybe more fun for the tween crowd than my younger girls, but it's a good pick for a wide variety of audiences.

7. Corpse Bride

Another fairly spooky one that my girls have been watching and loving for years now. I initially thought it would be too creepy for them, but they have never had a problem.

8. Casper

Who doesn't love Casper? Sweet childish ghost who just wants a friend.

9. The Witches

Evil nasty witches just asking to be defeated by some clever kids.

10. Ghostbusters

Loved this one when I was a kid and still love it. Extra perk is I now get all of the jokes.

11. Addams Family Values

This one is not so much for the preschool crowd. I remember my older daughter asking me "why are they trying to kill the baby?". Kind of awkward. But now they are old enough to accept that it's all just silliness.

12. The Legend of Sleepy Hollow

I love the cartoon version by Walt Disney. There may be other good versions out there though. My 7 year old just read the book.

13. The Canterville Ghost

Haven't actually tried this one with my kids yet, but I think they'll like it. I've seen a couple of versions and have enjoyed the one's I've seen. The newest one has Patrick Stewart. :)

14. The Pirates of the Caribbean

This one is very creepy. Wouldn't watch this with the very young or timid, but my 7 yr old loves it.

15. The Worst Witch

Delightfully cheesy 80's flick. Tim Curry does a music video scene that is too funny and weird to miss. Nice for all ages.

Ella's Words

2010-10-19T10:42:00.000-07:00

Just thought I'd write something to get me rolling again. This is nothing really meaningful, it's just a way to hopefully get my brain moving.

I've grounded myself until the budget is caught back up so I thought it may be a good time to find ways to occupy myself at home without actually cleaning. Who knows, maybe I'll clean a bit even. I'm finally feeling better (past the nearly disabling “morning” sickness)

So I'm just trying to make a list of Ella's vocabulary (excluding signs). With my two oldest girls in school full time now, I'm on my own with her until baby number 4 makes her appearance, so I'm trying to make the best of it by being the attentive parent I once was.

“Mama” (can be referring to me, or anyone she wants to pick her up)

“Papa” (Usually her father, occasionally she calls me this as well, also her grandpapa)

“Yiya!” (This is her sister)

“Num num!” (any yummy food she wants to eat)

“Uh oh” (something just fell)

“Baw” (ball)

“gogog” (doggy)

“Papy” (paper)

“baby” (baby)

“Eeow” (cat)

“Eeeeee!” (brush teeth)

“Me!” (I want it)

“Mine!” (I'm going to fight you for it)

“Dow” (down)

“Do! (rhymes with and means GO. Says this to the dogs)

“bye bye” (obvious)

"Cacka" (Cracker or cookie)

“No” (also obvious)

"Baa" (bath)

"Po-ee" (potty)

That's all I can think of at the moment. She's also signing various words. So, not the best vocabulary in the world, but she sure does know how to get her point across. :)

Mommy Gamers

2010-03-03T10:41:00.001-08:00

So last night I was doing some dungeons with the gnome mage who is my husband. We kept getting booted. Now I'm trying to figure out if I should call the cable company and explain to them how inconvenient it is to be booted for 4 minutes when you are tanking bosses with a group of strangers. First I have to admit this is how I spend a portion of my free time. (It's best to do it when the kids are in bed. Especially the baby, who was recently responsible for an entire wipe after hitting the windows key with her foot. Oops.)

But hey, we all have our quirks right? And being an almost 30 year old mother of three doesn't mean I can't enjoy going online and fighting orcs with a bunch of 15 year old boys does it? I hope not.

This is Wisteriah. She's not my main, and her gear has not been a priority. She's currently working on getting her enchanting up. So if you have mats and want a free lvl 335 enchant or lower. Hit her up. Or if you just have some pants that actually cover the legs that would be nice. She's a warlock so a nice robe would probably be better.

Do you have any guilty pleasures? Are they as embarrassing as mine. I've been trying to get into crocheting. Really I have. But then I realize my warrior really needs a new trinket. What's a girl to do? I can't fit in time for everything.

Wagon Time

2010-03-02T13:02:00.000-08:00

I've let a lot of things go recently. Especially after the loss. I quit cooking, cleaning, and doing the things around the house and with the kids that I should be doing. DH took up some of the slack for a while, but he's back to work and having a stressful time and I really can't lean on him so much.

So back to holding myself accountable.

We have a goal of paying the house off within a year. So that's going to involve some scrimping. So I'm going to start working on the budget again. This month I'm going to focus on recording and just being more conscious of what I'm spending. Starting next month I'll try to put together a realistic budget based on what I learn.

Cleaning and meal planning are also things I need to get back into the habit of doing. I think I'll start zone cleaning (Flylady, here I come!) again. This house is small. It shouldn't be that hard.

So far this week I've spent $16 (Publix) I also got 4 loaves of whole wheat bread the discount bread store for $3 on saturday.

This weeks dinners are:
Monday: Green Curry Chicken, rice, steamed peas
Tuesday: Split pea soup, home made rolls
Wednesday: Chili, corn bread
Thursday: Winter vegetable bake
Friday: Roast Chicken with veggies
Saturday: Pasta salad, baby carrots
Sunday: Spanish Tortilla, green salad with tomatoes

Our Loss

2010-02-23T10:25:00.000-08:00

My pregnancy ended last Tuesday with the birth of my already deceased baby girl. She would have been my fourth daughter, but somewhere along the way, something went wrong. I had a bad feeling all through this pregnancy, and was already trying to brace myself for what I feared, and even expected on some level. The last time we heard her heartbeat was at 16 weeks.

We went in for the ultrasound at 20 weeks. The midwife's apprentice accompanied us. She asked me if there were any concerns and I told her I had not yet felt the baby move, and it troubled me. She assured me it wasn't that abnormal, especially with a first baby (this one was my 4rth). The doctor asked me the same thing, and I gave him the same answer. I received the same response from him.

Then I watched as he started the ultrasound, trying to get a good look at the baby. She was in a hard to get position. He jammed that thing down into my belly so hard. Much harder than I remember these being. He said something seemed off. He continued to do measurements, saying not too much. I watched the screen as my baby didn't move. At some point, when he was pushing especially hard, she did move. It was not a natural feeling. I kept pleading in my mind for him to address the real issue. By this point, I've always seen the heartbeat. Why isn't he talking about the heart? After a while, he shows me. It's a little box on the screen, inside it shows all of the blood/fluid flow. The placenta was rife with activity. Then he moves to the babies legs. Nothing. Then slowly up to the babies abdomen. It's completely still. No color, no activity. No heart. I suppose the heart was in there somewhere. But it wouldn't show up at all with absolutely no blood pumping. It's like my baby was hollow. Only then did he finally tell me what he'd been thinking.

My baby had passed. It had probably been some time as she (we wouldn't find out the sex until birth) was measuring very small. Probably not much past our last heartbeat check. We decided to have her in the hospital with the doctor. The midwife's apprentice accompanied us again. The dr was hoping we'd be done by midday on Tuesday. We went in that morning at about 7am. My body just didn't want to let go. I took morphine along with cytotec. I wanted so badly for it to be over, but I was so scared of what it would be like delivering a dead baby, even a really tiny one. I knew she would also be in really bad condition, due to the time she would have already been dead prior to birth. I was too scared to want to see her. That's not how I want to remember her. Dead for weeks. I preferred the gentler ultrasound view, with her tiny little hand up against her face, like she was just sleeping in there. Like any baby would do.

At around 8 pm, I was talking to my husband and the midwife as the contractions were getting stronger. I talked a lot of the time, trying to distract myself. Suddenly I felt, what I could only describe as a pop, down around my cervix. We told the nurse. She sort of peeked, but didn't see much. She was afraid to do a cervix check this time. She went and alerted the doctor to come. I waited. Then I felt something else. Something like the pop, then something sliding in there. My legs were still together. I called the nurse again. She had me open my legs to look, and I felt her slide right out. I just said 'oh.. I gave a tiny push, just for the last bit. My husband asked what it was, and the nurse told him. He looked. By the look on his face, I knew then, that I really did not want to look. My husband who seems so strong. He looked sick. I wanted him to look. But I regretted that even after seeing his face. But he is ok.

The doctor came in after the fact and cut the cord, examined the baby, who had been just lying there between my legs while we waited. I felt like crying then, but I didn't. He informed me that it looked like he was right, and that the baby had been gone for quite some time. I could tell he also was not eager for me to see the baby. Part of me feels like a monster. Everyone wants to see their baby. But I just couldn't. Not like that. If she had only just died, I could have. But not after weeks.

After that I just wanted to leave. Get back home to my baby and other kids. But the placenta wasn't ready. He warned me it might want to hang on. He'd give it a few hours then remove it surgically if he had to. Then they got really busy and sort of forgot about me. At around 11 he came to see me. I'd been on pitocin for a while now, as well as the cytotec to try to get the placenta out. They put my legs in the highest stirrups I've ever seen. Getting into that position alone, was enough to start pushing the placenta out. I held in until he was ready though, and he caught what there was and cleaned me out more thoroughly and with more tools than I think have ever been used on me. It was really uncomfortable, but he wanted to make sure I could get out of there soon. I passed some fairly large blood clots, and lost a little more blood than would have been good. But I was ok.

He sent me the release form, and I was heading out the door. I went to the bathroom to clean up, pee, change cloths. I felt really dizzy and really sick. I puked and heaved green bile for a little while. Then I was able to finish getting dressed. But I couldn't walk far. I sat on the little sofa thing for a bit. Then I told Karl I'd like a little support. I was ready to leave. We made it out into the hallway and out the door of the unit and that's as far as I could go. I asked for a chair, wheel chair, anything. I clung to the wall trying to stay off the floor. Afraid I couldn't get up if I went all the way down. The nurses came rushing out. Said I was completely pale and had me lay down right there in the middle of the floor, with my feet up in the air. They took my blood pressure, called the doctor. I ended up having to stay another hour. I took a nap. The labs came back ok, and they let me go. I got to ride in a wheelchair out to the car. I was tired and out of sorts, but so desperate to go home.

My 7 year old and 5 year old named the baby Artica Love. We plan to plant a tree near their bedroom window to help remember her. This is especially important to my 7 year old.

That's all there really is to say right now. I just wanted to share the story, the only one there will ever be about Artica Love.

Heart Month

2010-02-03T14:31:00.000-08:00

So February is Heart Month. Next week will be Congenital Heart Defects Awareness Week. I'm afraid that's too many words to be very catchy. However I thought I'd share some facts about heart disease and CHDs.

Congenital Heart Defects are the #1 birth defect. Source: March of Dimes

Congenital Heart Defects are the #1 cause of birth defect related deaths. Source: March of Dimes

About 1 out of every 100 babies are born each year with some type of Congenital Heart Defect. (approx. 40,000/year) Source: Children’s Heart Foundation

Nearly twice as many children die from Congenital Heart Defects in the United States each year as from all forms of childhood cancers combined, yet funding for pediatric cancer research is five times higher than funding for CHD. Source: Children’s Heart Foundation

The American Heart Association directs only $0.30 of every dollar donated toward research.

The remainder goes toward administration, education and fundraising efforts. Of the $0.30 that goes toward research only $0.01 goes toward pediatric cardiology for CHD. Source: Children’s Heart Foundation

This year approximately 4,000 babies will not live to see their first birthday because of Congenital Heart Defects. Source: Children’s Heart Foundation

http://www.itsmyheart.org/chd-information/chd-facts/

As you probably know, my youngest daughter was born with a serious heart defect. We had no idea until after her birth. She looked like a normal, healthy baby. Fat even. Then the doctor told me she would die soon without intervention. Then he did the most amazing thing. A heart catheter. Causing no more than a little bruising and tiny little hole in her groin area, he was able to use a balloon to open up her valve enough that she could live, without open heart surgery.

Since then she's had another procedure done. A surgery, but not the dreaded open heart. A surgeon was able to open her up under her arm, and remove a part of her aorta, and then sew it back together. It was considered a simple operation as far as heart surgery goes. Her Coarctation is considered repaired.

I'm told she will have to have her aortic valve replaced some day. It could be in 4 months, or it could be in 10 years. We really have no idea. She sees a cardiologist regularly, who checks to see if she is still okay. Every time I go, I hold my breath, bracing myself for the news. So far, so good. Her next appointment will be in May.

As it is, this is still a terrifying prognosis. But years ago, she may not have stood a chance at all, and look at what they can do now! All thanks to medical research. So if you are looking for something to support, think of all the babies that can be saved, all the families who are affected by CHD. Until I became a parent of a child with CHD, this problem barely existed. Now I see it is everywhere.

The Plan: Take #112397

2010-02-02T15:01:00.000-08:00

I have missed blogging. I never did it much, and I know few people actually ready it. But I enjoy it all the same. I also love reading other people's blogs. Especially the one's that motivate me. Blogs about being thrifty, homesteading, getting healthy, raising kids, etc... basically real life stuff, these all help me to learn new things, and/or get in the right frame of mind.

Along the way, I enjoy sharing my own story, because it also helps to get me focused on what's meaningful to me. And it helps me hold myself accountable. So here it is.

Today is nearly over, so I've got a few small goals that should be easily attainable.

Clear off the dining room table
Set up a “homework station” in the bookshelf in that area
Help Eliza with her homework (math, spelling, and online reading)
Have Evy join us doing her “homework”. The baby can have a snack with us, while we work.
Make a pasta salad for dinner.
Put kids in bed at a reasonable time.
Clean lettuce and prepare it so salad making will be easier during the week.

Let's see how I do.

On a somewhat related note, I'm working to get myself and the two youngest out and about during the day. Today we went to a science center. Most of the pics I got were in the play house though, because that's where I was able to get my camera out and let the baby play.

And yes, I realize my middle child looks like she was raised by wolves most of the time. I like to think of her as a "free spirit". I swear I did get her close to a hairbrush this morning, and I don't know when her face got messy.

Our New Home

2010-02-01T13:29:00.000-08:00

We are hoping this will more our less be our permanent home. This is the first time I've ever felt this way about a place. When we moved to California, I always saw it as something fun to do while we were young, but once we started having children, I wanted very much to raise them near our families. Then we moved to Texas. I viewed it as a stepping stone to getting closer to home. Still too far away to consider a forever home. I always thought of the house in terms of selling it. Not like it was really ours, but like it belonged to the next family who came along, and we were just keeping it for them.

But when we moved here what we were looking for was a place we could see ourselves in 10 years. A place to raise our children, and to work towards our dreams. What we wanted was land. Usable, country land in a decent school district. What we found was about 11 acres of beautiful countryside. I fell in love the first time we walked the property. Everything about it just seemed right. Except the house. The house is tiny. It's less than half the size of our last house. A good deal less. But we can always add on. And we intend to. For now, we've found that two bedrooms and 1.5 baths and a small living room and small office (it is technically supposed to be a bedroom, but it's so little!) is really quite sufficient for our family of 5.

I can't wait til the weather warms up and we can spend countless hours outside. Gardening, feeding chickens, collecting eggs, or just playing. I'm so glad we are finally home.

I hope I'll have lots of adventures here to share.

It's Been a While

2010-01-29T05:18:00.000-08:00

It's been a sort of crazy, hectic year. A lot has happened since I last posted on here, and I'd really like to start blogging and reading blogs again. I miss it.

I'll do a quick catch up.

Since I last posted Baby Girl was hospitalized again in September. She had a coarctation of the aorta. That's a mouthful, but basically just means that part of her aorta was too narrow. It was repaired by fairly simple surgery. Instead of open heart, they were able to open her up from the side/back and address only the aorta, not touching the actual heart, and she has recovered. Nothing new has needed to be done about the Aortic Stenosis (AS), thankfully. It's still there of course, looming threateningly over our heads. She still sees her cardiologist, who assures me it will have to be addressed again one day, it's just a matter of when, and most likely sometime well before she's grown. I don't like to think of that too much. It's out of my control.

The beginning of October we left Texas for good. We spent almost a month in temporary housing in Huntsville. Then we sort of went into limbo until mid-December. We now have a small house situated on 10 beautiful acres in a small town. Zizzy has started going to public school and we are all still adjusting to the new changes.

Both of the big girls have had birthdays this winter, so no I'm mommy to a 5 year old and a 7 year old. Baby Girl is 8 months old now. Baby #4 is due in late June/early July. We may be finding out the sex around the 11th of next month. I found a midwife just north of the Alabama border in TN. She has a center where I can go to have the baby. So glad I was able to find her.

Those are pretty much all of the important things. Aside from that, it's just been us trying to get our home, then us trying to adjust to the new place. Still working on that second part.

Summer

2009-07-02T11:07:00.000-07:00

We've been having a lovely time this summer. Since we were unable to move as planned, I've decided to embrace all the wonderful activities we can do here and make the best of it. I've always loved summer anyhow. The girls and I have been out and about every week.

Today we took a tour of the fire station. The best part was getting to go into the truck naturally. But they got to watch one of the firemen suit up which is important for them to see. In the event of a fire, they say many children are frightened of them in their suits and will sometimes even hide from them. So it's good for them to be prepared and learn to not be afraid of them.

We've been going swimming, to playdates, to splash parks, and there seem to be so many birthdays this summer as well.

It's been great.

Back to Normal

2009-06-24T14:45:00.000-07:00

Well, normal for me. :-P Having so much hit me at once right after baby's birth required some adjustment for me. First the job and move to Huntsville fell through, and then Daisy (baby's new web name, lol) was hospitalized, diagnosed and treated for a pretty serious heart defect. I took that really hard and honestly I couldn't imagine at the time how I could possibly ever really feel “normal” again.

But I do. She's healthy now. Not perfect. But life isn't perfect. It's a big mangled up mess, yet we go on day to day anyhow. This problem is just one more thing to add to that pile of crazy. It's not fun, but what can we do but accept it and keep on keepin' on? I like her cardiologist. He's got a great bedside manner. He's great with the kids and the adults and I feel really comfortable with my daughter in his care. Whenever we do finally get to move I'm going to miss him. I hope I'll like her future dr as well.

I also had some guilt to deal with. This is the first child I had outside of a hospital. The birth went very well. Perfect really, from my point of view. And when she was born I thought she was perfect. Her little head didn't even mold. Little did I know how not perfect she was on the inside. The midwife heard the heart murmur and advised me to have her seen by a pediatrician just to be on the safe side. I wasn't really concerned. I casually made a newborn appointment for her. Can't even remember if I mentioned the murmur or her fast respirations when I made it. She was home for a full week without seeing a doctor. Then when I brought her in, we were sent right away to emergency care at the children's hospital.

But despite how scary that all was, I wouldn't do things differently now. I had time to bond with her, to establish a healthy breastfeeding relationship and she had time to gain more weight. All of the doctors kept talking about how big and healthy she was (besides her heart of course) and how that helped her to get through the procedure, which ended up taking hours. So even though it could have been bad, it wasn't. It actually ended up being for the best. Just like hubby losing his job offer ended up being for the best. So rather than regret what I didn't do (which I can't change) I choose to be thankful for things as they are. *I am in no way advocating that people who have reason to suspect their child has a heart problem put off seeing a doctor.

Life is strange sometimes. But I'm glad to have a part in it, and glad my little girl is here too.

And things get more complicated

2009-05-27T13:33:00.000-07:00

On Thursday of last week I took the baby in for her well-baby appointment with her new doctor. I knew at the time she had a bit of a murmur at birth (though I'll admit I wasn't really sure what that even meant exactly) to ask about, as well as concern over her fast respirations. However I wasn't remotely prepared for what was to come.

After hearing her heart and counting her respirations, I was told my daughter's heart murmur was substansive and that her respirations were too fast for her to keep going like that for much longer without something giving out. She advised us to take her right to the ER at Cook Children's Medical Center in Ft Worth. By midnight she was diagnosed with aortic stenosis, admited to PICU and scheduled for a heart cath the following day. They performed the procedure with as much success as could be expected, and thankfully none of the potential dangers played out. After hours in the cath lab (there were some complications, and heart surgery was being considered) she came out and was taken back to PICU where she stayed for the next few days.

During that time I was on an emotional roller coaster. I still am to a point, because her heart defect is not something that can just be fixed so we could move on. It's going to hang over our heads for her whole life, and I can only hope it won't take her life some day. We are told that she will have to have that valve replaced some day, and the longer she can go without it, the better. But there is no way to know or really controll when that will be. It could be days, months, years... She could be an adult, but I'm afraid to look up the actual statistics. I am already living in terror of the day they tell me my baby needs open heart surgery. My biggest fear is to outlive any of my kids and here I am with a baby who's heart is all messed up, and it's like a ticking time bomb to me. I can't stand thinking about it. I wonder how I could ever feel normal again.

There were days in the hospital where all I could do was cry. I couldn't even look at my own baby without being overwhelmed with fear and dread over what could possibly come.

But I'm working through it. The truth is she could and hopefully will live a full happy life. And what purpose does fearing for the worst all the time serve? Nothing. It takes away from me and worse it could affect her. So I'm resolved to work on my perspective and do everything I can to stop fearing and dreading things that may never even come to pass and to focus on the here and now with my girl.

More of that Good News Bad News Thing

2009-05-20T18:05:00.000-07:00

First the good news that is more than good. Awesome even. Had my baby girl on May 13th. She weighed 9lbs 12oz and was 20 inches long. I may try and type up a birth story sometime soon. But I'm not sure there is much to tell. I had days of contractions and when she finally came, it was almost a whirlwind. I got in the tub at the birthcenter, yelled, knew I couldn't do it even as I was pushing, and next thing I know there's a big fat baby on me. Only she seemed so tiny. It's been a while since I held a newborn.

She's already over 11 lbs! And she wasn't even a week old when we weighed her. She's seeing a doctor tomorrow for well baby checkup and vaccines.

I want to post more, but the little bundle of joy is about to interupt, so I've got to cut this short.

Bad news = Job in Huntsville fell through. Would say more, but gotta run.

June 1st!!!!!

2009-03-19T11:50:00.000-07:00

Finally, I have some official news to share.

K was offered the job, and accepted it on the 11th. Since then there has been some fussing about when would be an appropriate transfer date. I'll admit that got me nervous all over again. But today it has been agreed upon by all parties that the transfer date will be June 1st!!!

I'm so happy. I'm walking on air. It's so great to really have a date to look at, something to plan towards. I can't say I can relax now. Way too much to do! But at least I can focus on something!!!

Baby's doing alright. The placenta is way up. But I think she may still be breech. So the midwife wants me to think about what we want to do if she stays that way. I'm a bit nervous about that, and obsessing trying to figure out what position she is in everytime I feel her move or kick. Was that a kick, or a headbutt. Is this her butt or her head? Wish I could know for sure. Shame I'm not one of those women who is super atuned to her body. That would be handy. But no, I'm Captain Oblivious. Sigh.

But overall, I'm feeling happy and positive right now. :)

The Good and the Bad

2009-03-06T12:38:00.001-08:00

On the good front:
1) Things are looking good for the job in Huntsville. No definite word yet though.

2) I've been volunteering at the JBF consignment sale in Fort Worth this week, and it's been nice to have some outside of the home occupation.

3) The bonus is I shouldn't have to do any more clothes shopping for any of the kids (including baby) until the fall. I got a changing table, cradle, boppy, receiving blankets, some toys and tons of clothes for all three girls for well under $300. Pretty much everything I could need.

4) The baby is due next month. It's still nearly 2 months away technically. But it's cool to say she's due next month. And a little frightening.

The bad:

1) I've been sick off and on, and really low on energy. Though I am on the upswing at least.

2) We're a little behind on the Kindergarten work. But I think we should be able to catch up pretty quickly.

3) I've got tons of housework to do, and so far I've only accomplished procrastinating, and a bit of laundry.

4) I witnessed an armed robbery last night, and didn't even realize it until it was over. (And feeling totally guilty for that. I was sitting there listening to NPR in my car the whole time the car in front of me was holding a gun on them) I'm shaken up over it, but especially upset for the kids. Holding a gun on kids working at McDonald's for a few hundred dollars is low. And I hope the police caught that sorry sack of s*** before he got too far.

Third Time's a Charm?

2009-03-02T12:40:00.001-08:00

Maybe. Maybe not. Only time will tell. K had another job interview today. This interview came together really quickly, and I'm thinking/hoping this one may be the one. Either way I don't feel too bad. Lots of people do tons of interviews before finding the right job. So even if it isn't as simple as 3 interviews, that's ok. But still ... *got my fingers crossed*.

Kindergarten with the Burrows

2009-02-23T08:20:00.000-08:00

I've been saying I'd do it, and I finally got around to it. I made a basic curriculum for this week. There are a few details which may change, but this is it.

Back when we were doing geography we would spend about a month per continent, (or focus on our local state or country). So we'll be studying South America for the rest of this month and continuing throughout March. The girls got to pick which continent we'd be working with. I'm trying to incorporate it in as many activities as I can. And we're on the look out for books to help us.

Anyhow, here is our plan for the week:

Monday
Math
Math-U-See

Reading
Bob books

Writing
Handwriting without Tears
Write a letter to someone

Spanish
Hooked on Spanish

Tuesday
Math
Work with telling time

Reading
Bob books

Music
Diez deditos

Spelling
We'll play Sight Word Bingo

Science
Rock hunting and identifying

Wednesday
Math
Math U See (continuing in book)

Reading
Bob Books

Writing
Handwriting without Tears

Spanish
Hooked on Spanish

Geography
Puzzle of South America, compare to globe
Color pics of animals found in South America

Thursday
Math
Counting with coins (nickels)

Reading
Bob Books

Music
Diez deditos

Spelling
Hooked on Spelling workbook

Social Studies
Read from one of the books about South America and discuss culture
Locally: Take a walk through the neighborhood, discuss buildings we see

Science
Activity involving weight (fill same sized containers with different weights) arrange by weight

Friday
Math
Math U See

Reading
Library

Art
South America related craft?

Writing
Write a story

Geography
SA Puzzle
Watch movie about South America

Update-ish

2009-02-20T12:41:00.000-08:00

Still no word from Alabama. I was sure we'd hear something by Monday, and here we are all the way back to the weekend. I do hope we'll hear something soon. The not knowing is brutal.

Thankfully, it's a beautiful day at least. We went to a playgroup and had a picnic while the kids played with various instruments and in general just ran around and acted like kids. I need to get something comfy to sit on outside. I could spend all day outside on a beautiful day like today.

We still need to work on school work though, so in a few minutes we'll start on math. I've switched the 6 yr old to Math U See and so far she's loving it. We ran across an interesting problem yesterday. I have her build numbers like the book says. She caught on quickly. The other day she made the number 426 103 and 78. Then she got the number 16 and she completely flipped out. Seriously. I didn't realize she was still struggling with teens. Those are some evil numbers. So I'm still working out how best to address the issue.

For reading she's still reading Bob Books. MIL sent some more for her birthday, and they are getting tougher, but she's getting better. I love watching her reading improve so fast. It's an amazing thing to observe.

For handwriting we are doing Handwriting Without Tears, and in general just letting her have a good time writing letters and stories and things.

She's started working on spelling, but I think we are going to take that one really slow. It's a first grade book, and I want her to have more sight words down before we really dive in there.

I think we are going to start back up on Geography too. We were having lots of fun with it, and she lost interest, but I think she's ready to take it back up. I have Friday's slated for Geography still.

I think I want to start writing up general lesson plans at the begining of each week to help keep us on task, and it's nice to have goals to acheive.

Today Will Be a Long Day

2009-02-16T06:35:00.000-08:00

Well, possibly.

I have the compulsive urge to keep checking my husband's job submission status on his work site. I'm hoping (and afraid) today will be the day we find out what is to happen. His last interview was Thursday, and it seems to me that today would be a good day for them to finally say whether he got the job or not.

Thankfully I do have one distraction though. I'm cleaning like a mad woman because I agreed to keep my neighbor's toddler this evening, and no one in their right mind would leave their child in my house as it is. Well, maybe they would. But I'd be really be embarrassed and wonder what everyone was saying about me behind my back, lol.

I know how I'll be spending my breaks though, when not doing school work with the girls. *sigh*

Keep your fingers crossed!

Coming Clean

2009-02-10T11:24:00.000-08:00

Ok, so I'm thinking maybe this wasn't the right month for me to try out a new food challenge. Truth is I can't focus on trying to use up every scrap of food if my kitchen is a disaster. And it is.

I'm focusing my energies to trying to get things back under control. I really suck a housekeeping. But I can't function like this. I let it get bad again, and at this point my family is just going to eat whatever takes the least amount of time and energy until I can go in the kitchen without wanting to cry.

FFWR Challenge Check In

2009-02-04T11:29:00.000-08:00

So far, I can't say I'm doing great. I ate leftover Winter Vegetable Chowder for breakfast. Though that was really because I LOVE the stuff, and I always eat it all up as quickly as possible.

I didn't put my co-op food away as soon as I should have, so I've got to try and use some things really fast. I think I'm going to start with the Kale, because it's looking rough, and I know I'll be most tempted to throw it away. So I'm currently on the look out for a simple kale recipe of some sort. I also need to wash the lettuce and eat lots and lots of salad!

Alabama?

2009-02-04T09:36:00.000-08:00

Today's the day my husband has his phone interview with the people in Huntsville. He thought it was at 10am, but it turns out it's actually not til 2pm. So the poor guy gets to bite his nails for several more hours. I think he'll do great, but who knows how it will turn out.

If it does go as we are hoping then we'll be relocating to Alabama in the very near future. Likely before this baby comes (late April is the due date). If that happens things will be interesting.

First selling our house will be a pain in the arse. I sure hope it sells. The house next to us is for sale right now. I think they may have a buyer *cross fingers* because if they do, then that bodes well for us. We'll be listing our house for less per square foot, *and* we have a much bigger back yard. We'll need to hire help to get the house ready to sell though. We are pretty rough on a house.

Next, Alabama isn't exactly my dream state. I want to live there, don't get me wrong. Because I want so desperately to be nearer our families. And it looks like Huntsville may be as close as we can get. But seriously! I've been looking into the laws in Alabama. First there is a state income tax. Ok, no big deal. We don't mind paying taxes. Then we discover that home brewing beer, even for personal use is ILLEGAL. This is one of Karl's favorite hobbies. He's only taken in up in the last year or two, and he really loves it. But in Alabama it's a crime.

On top of that lovely news and even more annoying is I can't get a midwife. I'm going to have to go across the border to TN to deliver at a birth center with a midwife. It seems that a homebirth is completely out of the question. Good thing I didn't want one. I'm unclear as to the exact laws. But in the entire Huntsville area I've been unable to find a midwife, and Huntsville is kind of a big town.

So welcome to Alabama and Republican small government. But as long as I can still have my chickens and maybe a cow, I'll be OK.

Getting Ready For Baby

2009-02-03T13:55:00.000-08:00

It's been too easy for me this time around to dwell on how horribly wrong all of this could go. I'm all to aware of the reality of how little control I have over the outcome of this pregnancy. But really, what good does that do?

I'm doing my best to embrace and look forward to the arrival of this baby. The further I get along, thankfully that is getting easier. She kicks around in there so fiercely it's pretty hard to ignore.

But I've gone ahead and made the plunge to start preparing for her. I've started buying diapers already. So far I've got 9 pocket diapers, two fitted, 13 prefolds, and a couple of all-in-ones and covers on the way. I've also ordered some wipes. Oh and a wetbag and wipes bag. The diapers are all second hand. All together I've spent $89. That should take care of all of our diapering needs for the first several months.

I've still got to get clothes, but I'm planning on going to a big consignment sale in March, so hopefully I'll get whatever I need then.

Here's a general list of what all I think I'll need for baby.

Shirts
Pants/shorts

PJs

a few dresses

socks

changing table

baskets

bassinet or cosleeper

new sling (maybe)

rocking chair (I know I don't need one, but I really want one)

few blankets

baby shampoo

baby bathtub

few baby toys at some point

new nursing bras (mine are 6 years old, I think I've earned some new one!)

cloth breast pads

I think that's it. I've probably missed something, but that's all I can think of at the moment.

It's been 4 years since I've had a newborn around, so I'm sort of starting over here.

Babycenter.com has a calculator for the cost of babies first year of life. It defaults to over $10,000! But you can go in and change the answers and stuff to reflect what your actual spending will be. I went in and did that, and managed to bring the whole thing down to right about $1000 and that's including things I'm not sure I'll buy. Not too bad.

If my husband ever needed another reason to love my boobs, what we're saving by not using formula alone, is astronomical.

A New Challenge!

2009-02-02T16:44:00.000-08:00

Ok, this one has some things in common with the Pantry Challenge.

It's The February Food Waste Reduction Challenge. I got the challenge from http://www.ihatemymessageboard.com/forum/index.php?showtopic=30802 and from there (as well as from the image at the top) you can follow the challenge back to it's original source.

I'm technically going to start tomorrows, as that's when my co-op comes in, and it just seems like a good time to start.

I'll start with taking an inventory of my fruits/veggies/and things from the fridge which I want to use up before they go bad. I just threw out some lettuce and about 5 oranges, and that is pretty lame. I'll try to make that the last time this happens this month.

Here's what I'm getting tomorrow, so I'll start with that.

Beets, Gold (or Red beets) 1 bunch

Cabbage, Napa 1

Carrots, Baby Peeled 1 lb Bag

Cauliflower 1Celery 1Garlic, White 2-3 ct (or less if large)

Kale, Lacinato 1 bunch

1 head of lettuce and 1 Baby Romaine Salad

Onions, Green (Scallions) 1 bunch

Tomatoes, Roma (Plum) 1 lb

Yams, Medium Garnet or Jewel 3 lbs

Apples, Fuji 3 lb bag'

Avocados, Hass 2 ct

Banana, Green 3.5-4 lb

Grapefruit, Ruby, Rio Star 2-2.5 lb

Mangos, Tommy Atkins 2 ct

Oranges, Valencia 4 lb bag

I'll try to get together a better inventory later, as well as put together a meal plan ASAP.

Avonlea's Birthday

2009-01-31T16:13:00.000-08:00

Two years ago today my neice was born still. She was gone before we got to know her, and left us with a huge hole in our hearts.

She was a beautiful dark haired angel, and even though it was hard, I'm glad I got to be there for her birth, since I'll never get another chance to hold her.

But nothing could compare to my sister's loss. No one should ever have to endure the loss of a child. My heart goes out to her.

I love you Sister, and I love you, Avonlea. Thinking of you always.

Hello to Anxiety and Hope, Again...

2009-01-29T12:58:00.000-08:00

So the man just e-mailed me. This morning he e-mailed me the most pessimistic and paranoid e-mail ever. Not only did it look like he had no chance at the job, but he may have stirred up trouble at his work place. There was a memo put out about an "Organizational Conflict of Interest" training meeting. This was probably because my husband was seeking work in another part of the same company.

I e-mailed him back assuring him (despite my own concern) that he'd done nothing wrong and had nothing to worry about. Besides, since when can managament get anything together THAT fast? Really.

Well he just found out, that he IS getting the interview next Wednesday!!! So of course that means that he was granted permission for release. Now I know my husband is awesome, intelligent, good at what he does, committed to hard work, and totally capable of doing whatever they throw at him. Let's hope whoever interviews him can tell that too. :)

Who know's what'll happen next. But the ball is still rolling.

Emotions ... Bah!

2009-01-28T15:19:00.000-08:00

Being pregnant is sort of a free pass for being ridiculously emotional. But it doesn't really make it any more fun.

Yesterday I was happy, hopeful, and excited, even if I was crying off and on most of the day for bizarre reasons. I watched the Desperate Housewives episode online with Eli the Handyman, and I bawled through pretty much the whole thing.

Husband got an offer for an interview with another part of his company in Alabama, which is what we've been hoping for. They had to contact his boss for permission though, and he hasn't heard back from them today. So now that hopefulness has turned to pessimism. :( It's great if his boss values him so much he doesn't want to let him go. But damnit! I never promised to spend the rest of my life here in Texas. Texas is fine and all. But it's never where I planned to be, and it feels so unfair and frustrating that I have no choice but to be here, raising my children away from family and friends.

So, I started out the day in a good mood, and now I don't want to do anything but sit and sulk. That's silly and pointless I know. I'm a grown woman. I have children to feed, teach, a house to clean, and plenty of productive things I could be doing. But I don't want to. I'll get over it. I always do. I am just so tired of having my one greatest wish dropped and squashed into the dirt over and over again. Well of course what is the MOST important to me, is here with me at all times. My children, my husband. I have a good life, a beautiful home. Comfort, lots of things to do, books, internet. Really I feel like one of the luckiest people in the world. Yet this one thing I want so badly stays out of my reach, leaving me to feel so completely powerless in my own life.

So today I pout. I'll clean the kitchen too. *sigh* Tomorrow I'll stop my whining and act like a grown up again. I won't bother my husband with my disappointment. It's out of his control. I'm thankful he has made this effort though. That alone makes me feel better. More like I matter.

My Kids Are Never Bored

2009-01-27T18:53:00.000-08:00

When I first found out I was pregnant with baby number 2 and my first born was just barely a year old, I was rather disappointed. I wasn't sure I wanted another at all, but certainly not that soon. But there she was, growing in my belly, so what could I do but love her?

I dealt with the usual mother guilt. My oldest began watching too many DVDs, and wasn't getting so much one on one attention from me. But she adjusted wonderfully to being a big sister. We never had issues with jealousy, or her acting out after the baby was born. She took the whole thing in stride.

I've been lucky with both my kids. They are so independent anyhow. They have never really needed me to entertain them. And now that they are older, they play together so much, I'm almost superfluous. They teach each other. Play games together. They are even finally starting to CLEAN together.

I was telling my husband the other day. They are always busy, always occupied. Take all their toys away, and they will play with a pile of dirty clothes. The only thing better than being the mother to these little girls, would be to be them. To live in a world where everything is there just for your amusement. Where a pile of dirty clothes and an empty box can be a fortress, or a bed for a baby dinosaur.

I love my kids.

Pantry Challenge

2009-01-27T13:41:00.001-08:00

So I went to Costco recently and spent over $100. They get me with their giant bags of organic produce, lol. I think that will put me over this month for food, but it still evens out, as it turns out I don't spend $200 on other supplies. We simply don't use that many toiletries, and such. I don't buy paper towels, and am trying to use more dish rags, I am cleaning almost everything with vinegar and water these days. So at least I've got that going for me.

However, I just read about someone doing a "Pantry Challenge". And due to my recent spending, I'm looking at something similar. Thankfully, it's not hard at all.

This week's menu is made up, and the only thing we needed to buy this week was milk, onions (very good deal at Kroger) and cat litter.

So here's this weeks menu:

Monday: Chili, corn muffins, salad

Tuesday: Morracan Lentil Soup, rolls, salad

Wednesday: Sweet potato and Black been burritos, salad

Thursday: Baked Salmon, mashed potatoes, steamed carrots and broccoli, and spinach

Friday: Winter vegetable chowder, rolls

Saturday: Rice with Chickpeas and tomatoes, spinach

Sunday: Roasted Chicken, veggies, salad, rolls

Not bad, for just using what we have in the house. I suspect we could do this for a few weeks. Especially if I really start using dried beans.

I think next month I'm going to try and spend even less!

Grocery Challenge Week #3

2009-01-21T14:08:00.000-08:00

First I started with a meal plan again. I also used a couple of coupons this week. Not many, but it's a start. I'm not so sure this whole coupon thing is for me or not. But I'll give it a fair shake.

Meal Plan for this week:

Sunday: Spinach Pasta Casserole, salad, baby carrots
Monday: Basic Black Bean Soup, corn muffins, salad
Tuesday: Fettuccini with Broccoli
Wednesday: Spicy Honey-glazed Chicken, brown rice, broccoli, butternut squash
Thursday: Thai Roll-ups, salad
Friday: Moraccan Lentil Soup (Crockpot meal), rolls, salad
Saturday: Chicken Broccoli Casserole from the freezer, rolls

Groceries:

Frsh Basil
2.99
2pk Grn Onions
1.19
Lipton tea bags
2.29
Lipton tea bags1.24-.50=
2.39
Fettuccine
1.99
Ragu
1.27
Ragu
1.27
Lipton Onion soup x
0.99
Lipton Onion soup x
0.99
Dove deoderant
1.64
Dove deoderant
1.64
Colgate Kids
1.24
Crest
1.69
Kroger
Cost
gallon Milk
1.25
gallon Milk
1.25
chicken broth
0.59
chicken broth
0.59
chicken broth
0.59
chicken broth
0.59
veg broth
0.59
veg broth
0.59
can chickpeas
0.79
can chickpeas.79
0.79
can chickpeas.79
0.79
can kidney beans
0.74
can kidney beans
0.74
can kidney beans
0.74
can corn
0.65
can corn
0.65
frzn orange juice
1.32
Half & half (lg)
1.99
whole turkeybreast
11.86
sour cream
1
cherry tomatoes
3.49
WW Bread
2.19

Total being around $58 for both groceries and extras (sorry about the lazy math)

Also, this week was co-op week

Basic Share $50
Beans, Green approx. 1lb
Broccoli 1
Carrots 2 lb bag
Chard, Green 1 bunch
Cucumbers 1.5-2 lb
Lettuce, Green Leaf 2
Onions, Yellow approx. 2 lb
Peppers, Sweet Mixed 1 pt
Potatoes, Yukon Gold approx. 3lb
Tomatoes, Cherry, Grape 1 pt
Apples, Granny Smith 3 lb bag
Avocados, Hass 2
Banana, Green 3.5-4 lb
Berries, Blueberries 6 oz
Oranges, Valencia 4 lb bag

Plus extras which included carrots, a cucumber, and a couple of potatoes

More Cleaning

2009-01-15T13:58:00.001-08:00

I cleaned out (scrubbed it down to the floor and everything) the pantry, and the fridge recently. Not a huge accomplishment. But it makes going into the kitchen feel so much better already. I didn't take any before pictures, but I did take some after pictures.

So, as you see, nothing spectacular. But I feel good about it. :)

It's about Time!

2009-01-14T18:07:00.000-08:00

It's been kind of slow going getting anything done this week. The Man has been ill, and I've been having trouble sleeping, so I've been exhausted, plus homeschool and all that jazz, but I've been making steady progress. I got the living room clean, the kitchen, dining room, foyer, and the playroom has been cleaned several times, lol.

Original pictures posted here: http://willowwinter.blogspot.com/2009/01/another-day-another-challenge.html

Here are the results. (I've still got some clutter to work on, but it's very managable as it is).

Busy!

2009-01-14T15:37:00.000-08:00

A certain special somebody in this house is turning 6 years old today! She's very excited about it. She's cleaning her playroom right now, so hopefully a couple of friend can come over and play. I'm not really a birthday party type of person. I never throw the girls parties. But this is supposed to be sort of a playdate with pizza, cake and ice cream (not in the grocery budget, since it's really part of her present. Her only other present from us is a new bicycle helmet.)

Anyhow, I do have those after pictures to post. I made sure to take them BEFORE the other kids show up. And hopefully some birthday pics to share later too.. But posting any will all have to wait until after everyone leaves.

Will check back in when I can. :)

I Got an Award!

2009-01-13T21:50:00.000-08:00

Yay for being in the right place at the right time. ;)

Thank you to MomCambell at http://the50dollarbudget.blogspot.com/ for so kindly nominating me.

If you are not familiar with what the Lemonade Award is, the Lemonade Award is given by a previous winner to 10 people who have shown a great attitude or gratitude this week. It’s a great way to show these people that you appreciate them.

I am passing on the award to the following:

http://www.5dollardinners.com/

http://makingdowiththenotsonew.blogspot.com/

http://talesofthetightwad.blogspot.com/

http://lifesfreetreats.blogspot.com/

http://thriftyaddict.blogspot.com/

http://dulcefamily.blogspot.com/

http://makingendsmeetonedealatatime.blogspot.com/

http://kidsandi.blogspot.com/

http://tinlovewith4.blogspot.com/

http://coffeebeankisses.blogspot.com/

You won, now what?

1. Put the logo on your blog or post.
2. Nominate at least 10 blogs, which show great Attitude and/or Gratitude! Be sure to link to your nominees within your post.
3. Let them know that they have received this award by commenting on their blog.
4. Share the love and link to this post and to the person from whom you received your award .

Grocery Challenge Week #2

2009-01-13T06:41:00.001-08:00

So I did my shopping for this week yesterday. I started from a meal plan again. I find that REALLY makes a difference!

Restating of my goal again: My goal is for my entire grocery shopping (including toiletries, dog food, cleaning stuff, etc) will be under $500 for the month. And just food will fall underr $300 for the month, counting the co-op, which costs $50 every other week.

Here's yesterday's bill:

Turkey bacon
2.09
Fresh Spinach
2.5
lg bag of baby carrots
2.5
5 lbs russets
3.49
lg tortillas
2.99
broccoli
2.29
fussili pasta
2.29
ragu sp sauce
1.52
ragu sp sauce
1.52
ragu sp sauce
1.52
red bell pepper
2.23
gallon milk
2.59
gallon milk
2.59
cilantro
2.54
shredded cheddar cheese
7.74
chewable vitamins
8.79
glad bags
6.5

Total:
56.22

Total for this month so far:
141.05 (Food)
156.87 (Total bill)

I've found that, besides the bacon, which I bought for a winter vegetable chowder (I have some butternut squashes to use up) I bought no meat this week. I'm going to be looking out for some good deals on meat next week.

I've ordered a subscription to the newspaper. I'll be getting it on Th-Sun. Can't wait to start getting it with the coupons and fliers and all. I've never really been one to shop like that, but it can't hurt to try.

Her Name is Eleanor

2009-01-09T14:25:00.000-08:00

Just got back from having our sonogram, and I thought I'd share the results with anyone who reads this. We are having another girl! (This makes three). She's going to be our last child (at least biologically; I still hope to foster/adopt later). I admit part of me was routing for a boy this time around, simply because I've never had a boy. But there is something special about having 3 girls as well.

We were planning on maybe waiting for a surprise. But I'm glad I went ahead and found out now, really.

Apparently, my placenta is really low though. I have no idea what that means, but she said something about it being "not quite previa" or something like that, so I've got some googling to do, I suppose.

No After Yet

2009-01-08T20:36:00.000-08:00

I've made great progress, but I'm worn out, and not quite ready for the After pictures yet. I'll try to finish in the morning, but may not post til later, because I've got another midwife appointment, and will be fairly busy tomorrow. I've been moving furniture around and stuff, and my hip joints are really feeling it. Pregnancy always makes me feel like my hips just want to tear apart and fall off or something, as it is.

Anyhow, it is going well. But I don't know how much more I will get done tonight.

Another Day, Another Challenge

2009-01-08T07:43:00.000-08:00

I guess I just like the word "challenge". It sort of spurs me into action the way "chicken" would get Marty Mcfly going, though hopefully in a more positive way.

Well, another area in my life which needs vast improvement is housekeeping. I'm a really, really terrible housekeeper. And with baby #3 on his or her way, I seriously have got to make some real improvements this year. Also, I'm throwing a sort of birthday party/playdate for my soon to be 6 year old next week and would like to not die of embarrassment from having actual people inside my house.

I'm going to start with my living room/dining room. We've been back home for a couple of days, and all the mess from the car has just moved into the house, but it's still a mess. I have a habit of making excuses for messes, rather than hurriedly working on them. But I'm going to hold myself accountable. And I'm going to share with you all (whether you exist or not) the horror that is our living area. So if nothing else, this post should serve to make a lot of people feel pretty darn good about their own house.

(Please excuse the fact that I have absolutely no decorating skills).

This post is going to hold only "Before" pictures, as I haven't done the "After" yet. Today's goal err... Challenge, is to have the "After" pictures ready to post by the end of the day.

Wish me luck, and try not to judge me too harshly.

This is the loveseat (what you can see of it) and a sneakpeak into the bar and dining room.

The couch and chaise and tables all covered in suitcases, bags, laundry stuff, and Christmas presents. The dog is an added bonus.

The girls' work area and the dusty mantle (I'm going to spare you a close up on the dust, just trust me, it's there).

This is where I keep the school supplies, games and such. Also more of the couch/table mess. (I'd like to point out that while the big white shelves may be ugly, I got them for free on Craigslist, which makes me happy.)

This is the only place my dog was able to find to lay down comfortably.

The bar. *sigh*

The dining room.

The foyer, "hall" and stairs. I don't usually keep my dirty clothes in my living room.

Grocery Challenge Week#1

2009-01-07T12:48:00.000-08:00

Monday was our first day back from TN. So that night we had Honey Baked Lentils with rice and canned green beans. (All things from our pantry) And then I sat down and wrote out a meal plan, which takes into account the fresh produce we get from our Co-op.

So here is this weeks meal plan (including Monday, even if that is cheating)

Monday
Breakfast FFYS (fend for yourself)
Lunch FFYS
Dinner Honey Baked Lentils Rice Green Beans

Tuesday
Breakfast FFYS
Lunch PB Crackers Fruit
Dinner Roast Chicken Vegetables Rolls

Wednesday
Breakfast Fruit, cereal
Lunch PB&J Sandwiches and veggies
Dinner Chicken Dumplins, Salad, Sweet Potatoes

Thursday
Breakfast Oatmeal
Lunch Eggplant Parm
Dinner Curried Lentil Soup Bok Choy Salad Bread

Friday
Breakfast Fruit Toast
Lunch Pasta Salad
Dinner Veg Lasagna

Saturday
Breakfast Oatmeal Fruit
Lunch Butternut Squash pasta
Dinner Rice with Chickpeas and Tomatoes Salad

Sunday
Breakfast Pancakes
Lunch Spaghetti, Salad
Dinner Veggie Chili, salad, corn muffins

______________________________________

Here is yesterday's shopping list and total spent

Org Milk (2 gallons)
Ragu Spaghetti Sauce (4 jars)
Ramen Noodles (8 pack... It's for the bok choy salad, I swear!)
Russ Potatoes (5 lbs)
Frozen Spinach (2 bags)
Brown Rice
Cheese sticks
Mozz Cheese
Ric Cheese
Lentils (dry, 3 bags)
Sesame Seeds
Almonds (slivered)
Red Wine Vinegar
Green Onions
Bread
Whole Chicken
Marshmallows

Total Spent = $50.68

I also got our organic co-op food yesterday (we get it every other week)

Basic Share $50
Bok Choy 1
Carrots, Baby Peeled 1 lb Bag
Cucumbers 1.5-2 LB
Eggplant
1Lettuce, Red Leaf
Celery
Butternut Squash
Tomatoes, Roma (Plum) approx. 1 LB
Yams, Medium Garnet or Jewel 3 LB
Apples, Rome 7-8 ct (info below)
Avocados, Hass 2 ct
Grapefruit, Ruby, Rio Star 2-3 ct
Tangerines, Satsuma 6-7 ct
Bananas
Pears, Bartlett 7-8 ct

I also got extra tomatoes, bananas and an extra butternut squash

On top of that, the distrubuter (who also happens to be my husband's coworker's wife) gave me 3 cute cloth diapers! So I walked away feeling like I'd won the lottery.

Grocery Challenge

2009-01-07T08:29:00.000-08:00

So, it's a new year. (We've addressed that already, I know). So it's time to try and embrace some life improving goals. I've decided to start with the grocery bill. Budgeting is something I once enjoyed and I've become too comfortable with spending lately. I'd like to save some money and feel good about myself, at least in this area. I have other goals I'm going to address later, but this is where I shall start.

I've set the goal for spending $300 or less this month on food. Less than $500 for all of our household needs, including pet food/care, toiletries and cleaning supplies. I've also sworn off of fast food. I've been using that as a crutch on busy days, and on days when I'm not feeling well. My kids and I are eating too many hamburgers, and it will stop. So the new rule is: NO MORE DRIVE-THRUS. No more delivery pizza either.

This week I made out a meal plan and grocery list and stuck to it. So far so good. In my next entry, I'll post my meal plan, and what I've spent so far. I'll use this place to help hold me accountable.

It's a New Year

2009-01-06T15:45:00.000-08:00

So I figured what better time to actually start posting on my blog.

We got back from visiting family in TN this week, and so we're getting our noses back to the old grindstone.

I had a midwife appointment today. We were supposed to be having a sonogram, which was the whole reason we scheduled for the middle of the work day, but she she completely forgot and let the guy go as soon as I got there. Very frustrating. So we are rescheduling for Friday hopefully.

I've been on the girls about getting their toys picked up all day. It's such a battle. Finally, I really understand where my mom was coming from that day she walked in my bedroom with a garbage bag and started tossing things in while my sister and I begged and wailed with all our heart as if she had walked in our room and started slaughtering our family dog. I always thought it was so horrible that she did that to us. Now I realize the poor woman was at the end of her rope. I wonder how much farther my own kids will push me, and what I can do about it. I really don't want to go there.